Sunday, March 01, 2009
The peak and the downfall of my life in 2008, all happened within a month, dated 27/11 till 16/12, the last day i saw her. its abt someone i met, whom i really thought is the one for me, but suddenly left me without a trace. with the help of a dear friend, i already have her new contact but thinking whether to contact her back or not, since shes left me for no fucking reason and leave me in a vulnerable state for some time, i have finally moved on , partially.27/11/08
met this girl at expo john little, a salesgirl for ANIMAL brand, my eyes could not look away from her,was with hadi azwan & zarifi and azwan bought two shirts from her, i, on the other hand was to afraid to approach her(bolpe kat tekak)
i planned to get her number the next day, cause i actually planned to got to sitex for all the four day the event was held. but unfortunatly,
the next day i returned to john little she wasnt there, was a bit scared that i wouldnt see her again but i believed she might be there the next day,
so i came back and it was on a sat.. she was there, standing like an angel from the heavens, she stands out from the rest, in many ways.
so at that point of time, i was with sharrir, and waiting for my friends to come, we walked around there, than went out, and million thanks to him who made everything possible,i had to put myself together and ask her number, but i was still, too scared. than a few words of encouragement from sharrir, i aprroached her.
i muscled my courage and open a topic with her, i told her i came the other day and my friend bought two shirts from her, but at that point she didnt remember.
so i told her i wanted to get to know her better and i asked her number, she was hesitant because she was working, so she told me and i saved it. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.i missed called her and said thanks, and after that i went out with sharrir and went to the sitex hall as he was finding smth, and less than twenty mins after i left john little, she texted me . i was so happy and excited. so i found out her name was aisyah, funny story cus at the first day i told zariffi than i had a felling her name was aisyah, okayyy.. so we texted till the sunday night, when seh suddenly text me saying smth abt not working at animal anymore dont look for her or smth, and i tot,only two days and this girl is running away? i texted her back but there was no reply, i felt stranged, but i waited .
1/12/08
i was working with aizzul at nyp , after everything finished, we ate at mcdonals in nyp. suddenly i recieved a text, saw the name and it was aisyah, my new friend, saying her ppd was low and could not reply all than, my mind and heart lighten abit knowing that she wasnt avoiding me, so we text again and got to know each other more,
after that i headed to work at cck, and suprisingly, she offered to wait for me to end work at eleven as she was nearby at jurong with her friend, i was first exited to meet her for the first time in person, but second scared as i might screw up as i usually didnt know what to talk abt, when she came, i went to the dumpster to smoke, and i just got to know that she smokes too,so on the way back we talked alot and i found out some interesting facts abt us, that actually suprised and amazed me and kept me thinking, could this be the girl? firstly, we both were using the same crumpler two million dollar home both red in colour and her friend was already teasing us abt it, second, i got to know that she was also addicted to viceroy fiters red that is, my favourite brand of ciggs too.
thirdly, she browsed my phone looking at my pictures, and a picture of my dream bike, drz400 happened to pop up first and she said, eh my dream bike!,
so i sent her till toa payoh, where she lived . sit ard at the interchange for awhile while i was waiting for the last train to come, than she took the bus 238 back home, and i hopped on the last train home, oh yeah, i got a pencil from her which she took from somewhere, let it be a proof of our new, beautiful friendship, aisyah, thanks for the pencil, love it.
4/12/08
as the days past, i got to know more abt her, and at this point of time, im kinda happy i met her, cus i think shes the one. but she has just broken up with her bf, well, i think what we both think are different, as in i treat her as my ' hopefully soon to be gf' but i think she isnt on the same line as me, what i mean is shes just treating us as friends, which is okay as every relationship went thru its friendship stage,than move on, i met her almost everyday, she pick me up from work, i pick her up from work, yeah fair, and i always hopped on the last train cus i sent her to toapayoh int, than headed home, and ya, i gave a a kiss goodbye before i left her =) a few days ago we went town, to me so was was our best day out, it was fun yeah, but come to think of it, everytime i met her i had fun just looking at her eyes, so yeah..
8/12/08
on sat i had a dinner with subway crews at sakura international , before that met her and walked ard town before she decided to meet her friends instead of heading to a kenduri, met her at orchard, sat outside wisma, talked and than walked ard, had preety much fun although it was just like a few hours, than today, hari raya haji, i met her at night near her grands place,at toa payoh too, sat under a block and talked. she was wearing a black kurung, looked so beautiful and sweet. i took a pic of her in that and the image is sure gonna stay for a long time, ever the most beautiful words cant describe what she is to me, a thousand perfect songs combined would describe only half of what she is to me, im felling it coming back after a long time, that is love. im falling for her.
13/12/08
the last time i saw her was on monday, five days without meeting her is like not puffing a cigg for a day. hopefully ill see her soon.
15/12/08
she decided to meet me , so i rushed to town after work and met her, after a week not meeting her, i was happy, so we slacked at town as usual as she's a town girl who always slack there, which i used to be like that,
so took the bus back home from town to toapayoh that is than took the last train,
18/12/08
she fetched me from work ysterday and we took bus to town, i had taka coupons worth $60 so i decided to go shop with her, actually two days ago i went ther to take a look but i couldnt decide on anything, than i came back today, got 2
puma shirts, actually thought of getting a pair of vans old skol but i think i have too many shoes at the moment. she wanted a pair too, but nope, the two puma shirts, she liked it i liked it so i got it, it was all kinda in a rush
cus she was gonna meet her friend after that, so i took the train with her toward marina and i dropped at city hall where i met khoi,
the day went alright until a point where we were heading to taka and she told me she was meeting her friend afterwars, i ask her, why are u leaving me, actually i meant it a joke, than she replied, bye forever, im goin mia,
and i tot to myself for a sec, what if she really did that, i just got to know her and ya im falling for her, but as im optimistic, i took it as a joke and carried on.. on the way to marina, i asked her abt it again and she said the same thing,
im goin mia you wont see me again .. i paused, i felt scared seriously,again i took it a a joke but with a bit of seriousness, so when the train reached city hall, i gave her a kiss on the cheek and alighted, i looked back inside where she was,
she wasnt looking back..i sense smth amiss.
late entry:
i was having a discussion abt the bbq we fushans were to have the tomorrow and suddenly at nine plus just now at night, i got a msg from her, saying pls dont call or text, i have problems, i was seriously scared and sad, cause, the first reaction/ thought i had was that she was leaving or smth and didnt want me to contact her anymore, that thought stayed for awhile, until the guys cheered me up abit, i wasnt myself, i was thinking abt her all the while since i got the text. i was so stressed up. until at ard one in the morning, when i know she was already at home but not asleep, i replied wanting to know what i did to her till she said it like so serious, my first thought still stay with me, until i got her reply, she said she is having some problems and dont want to be contacted for the time being for god knows what reason, and she said she'll get back to me once everything is fine, that reply relaxed my brain for awhile since the last few hours, so i let it rest there, but i still have thoughts, i was worried abt her, as im optimistic, i believe that she really has problems and im gonna let her settle , without me ard, cause i trust her.
25/12/08
the last day i contacted her was on the monday, i was at home just came back from national stadium, spore vs vietnam where spore lost, okay not the point, earlier today i topedup her ppd for her willingly cause i really miss her, so i tot i had the chance to contact her, but when morning arrived, i text her a morning msg and she replied, asking where i am, i was at work at that time but the night before she told me she was accompanying her mummy out the day, so i replied to her i was at work, and ask where she is, she replied she was at home, so i replied again asking waht time will she be leaving home but she didnt reply back.. i waited, but no reply after ard 2 hours, so i texted her opening a new topic abt her new job at starbucks, and she replied this, " u im sory im nt in any mood for the time being,pls.
i wanna be alone for the time being.i get back to you once everything is fine.i promise.im sory.bye." i was at work and my mood totally changed, and i mean total different, then, i had no mood. that was the last text i got from her, pls aisyah, if you could read this, i really treasure you, although we are not yet an item, although its just been awhile, i can really say i love you, aisyah.
Your the girl in my favourite dream,
please stay cause i wont hurt you.
Im not gonna give you up,
id give up everything for you.
why are you running?
- quotes from a song intro-ed by her& reminds me of her, christopher-run.
27/12/08
exacly today, a month ago, my eyes stumbled apon an angel. today a month ago was the day i first laid my eyes at her, aisyah. but one month later, which is today, seems so far away. but today wasnt the first day i talked to her.. actually ya but she didnt know me, two days later when i mastered up my courage to go and talk to her, tats the day, im sure it dont matter to her at all but i really matters to me, i will forever remember the day i talked to her, cause thats one of my biggest challanges, challanged by myself. i made it through then, but god know if
i'll make it through this..
3/01/09
i fucking miss her.
Aisyah Mazlan, Qyshka, if ur reading this, i'd do almost anything just to see you again.
Pictures than meant more than a million words,
